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What if I Doubt? It usually comes late at
night while the mind in wandering over the day’s events, memories of family vacations,
memories of a pet throwing up on your favorite jeans, family who have
died... In a rush it arrives and it
causes a slight panic to run through the thoughts of your mind. It’s the questions that everyone
experiences from time to time. What
if there is no God? What if there is
no heaven? What if we are wrong and
someone else is right? What if I doubt? Isn’t that the opposite of faith? If faith is belief in something with no
doubt attached, then a person would have to conclude that people with doubt
have no faith. This is the sort of
judgment that some Christians throw at another person who has genuine
questions. “You aren’t a very good
Christian if you wonder if there is a God,” they would conclude. There is a certain amount of shallowness
to people who think faith is belief in something with no doubt attached. They lack courage to explore new thought
and lack the guts to question their religion. There is an added danger to a person who does not allow
themselves to doubt. They might be persuaded
by someone to do something that is unjust and evil in the name of their
religion. We can see this sharply in
the actions of religious terrorists and abortion clinic bombers. Lack of doubt could lead to lack of
Godliness. So, what is faith? Faith is trusting in something higher than ourselves that pulls
us above our doubt. Trusting that God
can pull us above our fears, troubles, and questions is the character of
faith. But the doubt does not
disappear. It is still below, quite
visible while you are holding onto God.
It can still be stared down at and even dipped into from time to
time. And this is not a bad
thing. Sometimes the “something
higher than ourselves” that we grab onto is not God at all but a lesser
god. Sometimes we put our complete
trust in our friends and are crushed when they let us down. A healthy dose of doubt would let us see
that we were grabbing onto the wrong thing.
Times of doubt are the Holy Spirit’s opportunity to redirect our faith
and our lives to something even better.
Dipping into the pool of doubt is actually a courageous step that can
lead to an even better faith. |
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